Saving the world from Atrocious Fashion, One Celebrity at a Time

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Ziyi is The One

Posted by Mean Critic
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Chinese superstars Jackie Chan and ZIYI ZHANG have signed up to sing the title track for upcoming Olympic-themed movie THE ONE. The acting duo will join fellow Chinese celebrities Lee-Hom Wang and Stefanie Sun to sing the movie's theme tune - entitled Stand Up - for the Wange Zhebin-produced venture. The film depicts the life of Liu Changchun, China's first Olympian who represented the communist country at the Los Angeles games in 1932 after battling Japanese occupation to appear at the events. It will act as a tribute to the 2008 Beijing Games, which have prompted calls for a boycott from international protesters who oppose the nation's oppressive hold over Tibet.
The One is set to be released in May (08), ahead of the Olympics in August.

Rating: 2

When in doubt wear black and we heart black for that very reason. But it also doesn't mean that you will stand out or steal the show. This was a fantasy theme so everybody is trying to be  as fantastic as the next person. Black doesn't work this time.

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Jordin has Recovered

Posted by justinemae
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Last year’s American Idol champ Jordin Sparks is once again up and running after recovering from a vocal chord injury. The singer is coming back with a vengeance – rejoining Alicia Keys on tour and shooting a new music video.

The 18-year-old took a breather a few months ago after her vocal chords started to bleed from too much singing. Now, Jordin is back on track from where she left off.

No wonder she’s smiling.

Rating: 2 

It is not even the neon green shoes or the corny fading effect on her dress that is the worst of Jordin Spark’s whole look – it’s the hair! Frizzy and in need of a good trim, it is definitely not something to grin about.

I’d tame it if I were her. Or give it a good blow-dry.

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Dorky Michelle

Posted by Mean Critic
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Michelle Strachtenberg

I just met Ron Howard. I was such a dork.

There's something sexy about a man's watch fitting a woman's wrist, like you've borrowed it from your boyfriend.

I am young. I better show off what I have now.

I chose to wait to get my drivers license. Since I was working and I didn't have time, I got it like a week before my 18th birthday.

The way to my heart is by being truthful and spontaneous.

Rating: 2

Friends, Romans, lend me your ears. What, no headpiece? Okay, her fantasy was probably to be among the gladiators or something but this costume is a little too tiring already.

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Sarah, It’s Depressing

Posted by Mean Critic
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Sarah Silverman is best known for her cutting stand-up comedy routines although her career also includes writing and acting for television and film. Born to Jewish-American parents Donald and Beth Ann Silverman in Bedford, New Hampshire, she has three sisters. Silverman suffers from clinical depression, of which she has been very open about in interviews and her comedy.

She started out as a writer for "Saturday Night Live" (1993-94). After that she did some feature film appearances, and eventually moved back to television, appearing in the comedy series "Greg the Bunny". She also made numerous appearances in other television shows including "Frasier" and "Monk".

Rating: 2

What was she trying to do, look cool? Not in the polka dot number sweetheart! It's not even funny. There is only one Minnie Mouse and she owns polka dots!

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Amanda Talks About Growing Pains

Posted by Mean Critic
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In 2008, Amanda Bynes acknowledged that she definitely went through some "growing pains" with her parents. At one point, she wanted a fancy new car, but her parents ended up using Amanda's money to buy her the exact same, less glamorous car that her two older siblings had, and that really upset Amanda. She says that they went through some family counseling for those sorts of problems and are doing much better, although her parents aren't always thrilled with her hair-dying choices, or when they think she wears too much makeup. Still, Amanda credits her mother and father for "guiding her and making sure she never fell off the deep end."

Amanda has been known to run up to her co-stars and give them big hugs on the first day of shooting for her movies. Many of her Sydney White co-stars also commented that she is extremely friendly and open to fans who come up to her for pictures and autographs.

Amanda was the voice of Taffy in Rugrats, a popular children's cartoon.

Amanda was ranked #79 in FHM's 100 Sexiest Women in the World of 2007.

Rating: 2

We heart Amanda. We enjoyed her in She's the Man to Sydney White to Hairspray but darn girl, blue pumps with the orange dress? The question is who thought about this first, Katie at the Costume Gala or Amanda at Mr. Chow. Whatever, it's ugly together.

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That Frisian Girl Famke

Posted by Mean Critic
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Famke Jannsen

In 2003, Famkee was so distraught after losing her luxury purse at a birthday bash for actor pal Sam Rockwell, she had all party-goers on the floor searching for it.

Denies reports of a dalliance with hunky Ben Affleck - insisting she's quite content on her own.

Has turned into the dog-loving freak she always used to despise - she dresses her pooch.

The role of Jadzia Dax in STAR TREK: DEEP SPACE NINE (1993) was initially offered to her. Both she and Michelle Forbes turned down the roles in order to remain available to appear in feature films.

Originally cast as Serleena in MEN IN BLACK 2 (2002), and even completed some of the filming, but was forced to drop out of the project due to a death in the family.

Her name is Frisian for little girl.

Her two sisters are blonde and blue-eyed, while she is the only brunette.

Offered the lead female role in TERMINATOR 3 (T3), but turned it down.

Rating: 2

This may conceal the love muffins but this is just another variety of the mermaid inspired dress. Don't they look like oversize fish scales?

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Alessandra: Victoria’s Secret

Posted by Mean Critic
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Alessandra Ambrosio

As a child, she felt insecure about her appearance, particularly of her large, obvious ears.

Alessandra had cosmetic surgery to get her ears pinned back, and had complications from the surgery for the two years following.

As an early teen, she enrolled in a modeling class and subsequently was entered in the Elite modeling agency's 1996 Look of the Year competition. Though she did not win, she was offered an Elite contract one year after.

MTV (US) once offered her a position as a VJ but she turned them down because it would have meant no more catwalk work.

Alessandra's last name is spelled in Portuguese as Ambrósio, but she omits the diacritic mark in her modeling work

Rating: 2

I like a dress that can conceal baby bumps or love handles. Alessandra definitely has a cute one on except that wearing it with pumps looks a little stiff. Maybe fun cute wedge shoes?

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Eva: The Ugly Duckling?

Posted by Mean Critic
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Eva Longoria

"Me? Oh, early, early on. It was high school. No, actually, younger. I was the ugly duckling growing up. My sisters were very beautiful and I was the ugly dark one or la prieta faya as a child. I was the only one with black hair. I was the only one with dark skin. So I learned to develop a personality and learned not to rely on my superficial looks because I didn't have them. And so I became very happy. I was always the funny one, you know. I was always the class clown. I never really thought about image or appearance until now in my career. It is kind of ironic that I'm on people's lips as 'the most beautiful' or 'the sexiest', etc." (on what age she found happiness)

"I definitely have reality checks. Reality checks doesn't necessarily mean you're in a deep depression. I think it's just: 'Oh, I'm here in Cannes. It's amazing. It's beautiful. I can't believe this is happening.' I have those kinds of things, but never really, 'Oh my God, my life . . .' Not those kind of things."

"My only divorce!" she roars with laughter. "My first divorce?!" She corrects herself: "My first marriage!" (on the lowest point of her life)

Rating: 2

Eva since you are hanging out with Victoria Beckham, you should pick up a thing or two about bags. Posh always carries a bag that complements the entire outfit. In Eva's case, her blue bag is fighting for its own attention. Too eye candy indeed.

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Mariah is Going to be a Mother!

Posted by Mean Critic
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After playing coy in the days surrounding their semi-secret wedding, Nick Cannon and Mariah Carey are finally stepping out as a married couple. The pair made their first appearance as man and woman at Time magazine's "100 Most Influential People in the World" event Thursday night, and more material has emerged from their interview with People magazine about their nuptials in the Bahamas last week.

Continuing an ongoing celebrity tradition, Carey, 38, and Cannon, 27, told the magazine that they got tattoos to mark the occasion — which was a tip-off to some friends about the wedding. "One thing [few people] knew was we got tattoos a few weeks earlier. So anyone who saw my tattoo wasn't surprised," said Carey.

Cannon added, "To me rings are special and exciting, but tattoos mean more than anything. They're forever and ever. They professed our love."

Carey said she only told "about four people" about the wedding, and only a dozen guests attended the sunset affair, where they dined on Maine lobster and sipped Dom Perignon champagne. The couple wed at Carey's Bahamian estate on April 30 after sparks began flying just a few months earlier in late March on the set of Carey's new video, "Bye Bye," in which she cast Cannon as her love interest.

"From the first time we sat down to discuss the video at the Beverly Hills Hotel, we connected," Cannon told the magazine. "We had so much in common spiritually, and we laugh at the same things. I didn't have to put on my mac-daddy-suave mode. I was able to be myself with her. We are both eternally 12 years old."

The wedding was presided over by Carey's pastor, Clarence Keaton, who flew in from New York. "The whole wedding was really beautiful and sweet," she said. "Being there with loved ones under the sky … it was a spiritual moment." (The role of the Bahamian pastor who earlier said he presided over the wedding was unclear.)

Watching his bride-to-be walk down the aisle, the typically gregarious Cannon said he was struck speechless. "I was elated, but I was thinking, 'Don't pass out,' " he told People. "[The pastor] said, 'The eyes are the window to the soul,' then gave us an entire minute to stare into each other's eyes. So I was saying, 'Don't cry.' "

The newlyweds say they've already started talking about having children. "It's part of the whole purpose of getting married," Carey said. "I'd just want our children to have the best childhood and upbringing they possibly could."

Rating: 2

Now that Mariah is married and is thinking of having kids, maybe we will see little of her skimpy trashy outfits. I mean, we all need to have those cute little dresses - maybe even have a few of them but if you have everything in the same design in different colors then Houston, we have a problem. Big problem. This is too much flaunting of the flesh.

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What Elizabeth Could Be Craving Right Now

Posted by Mean Critic
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Elizabeth Hasselbeck

Elisabeth's favorite non-alcoholic beverage is orange seltzer water and her favorite alcoholic beverage is a Vanilla Stoli.

Elisabeth's favorite candy are Sour Patch Kids and her favorite dessert is Ben & Jerry's Devil ice cream.

Elisabeth's favorite snack foods are cashews, peanut butter, and cold smoothies.

Elisabeth's favorite vegetables are cucumbers and fresh green beans.

Elisabeth's favorite breakfast is scrambled eggs and her favorite dinner is either breakfast foods or stir fry.

Elisabeth's favorite smells are breakfast smells.

Rating: 3

Elizabeth has a huge bow in her pink trapeze and it's forgivable at some angle but when do we get to open the package?

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